How is it possible to wake up on a Monday and feel defeated even before I’ve had breakfast? I had a perfectly lovely day yesterday and I went to bed feeling grateful and happy.
(I had slated today to begin my protein shake program again since the last time I did it I was interrupted by a trip to Chicago.)
Yet, this morning when Charlie asked me if I was ready for my shake, I told him no. I don’t feel like it today.
I don’t feel like it today?
Translation: I don’t feel like having any rules today. I don’t feel like being restricted. I don’t wanna. I.DO.NOT.WANT.TO!
Looks like yours truly needs a really big attitude adjustment or perhaps just a fresh pair of soul glasses. How is it that just a few weeks ago I was excited to begin this program and not only that, I was having success with it. Today I woke up and said, “No. Not today. Nope.”
I’m tired, for one thing, and for another, I failed to do my preparation work. For me that means that I did not take the time over the weekend to feed my spirit with what it needed. I didn’t take the time to write in my journal. Although I always pray, I did not spend enough time actually feeling my prayers. I didn’t plan for today. I didn’t even think about today. I just went on my merry way letting the spirit blow me around wherever it wanted to.
Did I mention I’m tired?
And so thankfully, tomorrow is another day. This evening I will revisit my reasons for wanting to do the 2 weeks of protein shakes. I will again look at the photos of my pudgy face and squinting eyes and I will reaffirm that I want this face back again.
Yes, I know it’s been a while but this girl…she’s still in there. Is it wrong to miss my eyelids? Methinks not. Last time I did this, after just four days I saw signs of this girl coming back to life…
Just so you know, it’s not just the face I would like again, it’s the confidence and the health benefits I want too. I’d like to be able to look in the mirror again and love the face looking at me. I don’t feel that way right now. I don’t feel I even know the person in that mirror.
I just need to set my sites and start again….AGAIN.
And so I will. (I end a lot of stuff like this lately! ha ha)